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Thread: Top 10 Xbox Rumors - Stupid

  1. #1

    Default Top 10 Xbox Rumors - Stupid

    Came across this stupid website, thought I'd share the lameness with everyone.

    Xbox Top 10 Rumors

    10) Controller design inspired by Hitler’s moustache
    Yup. Just looking at the suggested group of hypo-nasal hairs under a weak magnifying glass is evidence enough. If only Adolf had shaved more often...

    9) Code named “MS Gaming Suite”
    It fits Microsoft to a tea. No mess. No muss. No fuss. Try getting some third party support with that name.

    8) X-Jewel not as tasty as first reported
    It actually tastes kind of bitter. Here I am thinking “Hey, if I plop down a whackload of cash I can get some free candy!”. Gone are my dreams of suckling the night away. Pervert.

    7) All the other letters were picked
    What’s more fun than an Xbox? Why... a Zbox of course!

    6) Official partners with Stalin, Satan, and Hanson
    Mmm, bop! Microsoft triple teams the gaming market with three of the worlds most hated/feared/execrated/disliked people. They realize that things change than people will soon realize that Stalin’s parents treated him badly, Satan’s just plain misunderstood, and Hanson has converted to a more “grungy/alterative” muzak style.

    5) Free inflatable Bill with two UPC codes and $5.00 S&H
    Have fun with your own personal rich guy. Good for stuff like... um... well... you can throw pies at it and you can use it for boxing practice. Use your imagination... no, wait, don’t. You pervert.

    4) It’s Fun
    Could it possibly be that at one time Microsoft said that the Xbox would be fun? Revolutionary? - sure! Powerful? - why not? A work of art? - more than likely. Just plain fun? - nope.

    3) One in 5 Xboxes includes $1000
    You can’t win unless you play. Since it’s estimated that Microsoft won’t make a profit until fiscal 2004, they might as well give some cash to the happy people.

    2) One in 3 Xboxes includes the black plague
    Give the gift that keeps on giving. What says “I think you’re swell!” then death from a rare strand of virulent smallpox. Remember: there’s a 1:15 chance you’ll get both the money and a painful extinction.

    1) Xbox is made of people
    Kind of like soylent green, except with video games. The heatsinks/fans are made of fingernails, the DVD lenses are made of retinas, and the hard drives are made of... well... you know. Pervert

  2. #2
    Registered User cityson's Avatar
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    Uh huh? Very funny....
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  3. #3
    Formerly Xenocide... Snapple's Avatar
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    that just ****ed me off

    they arent partners with hanson but if they are

    and about that better name i should go over there and beat the **** out of that ass hole
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  4. #4
    Registered User symposiumx's Avatar
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    Originally posted by xboxfan38



    that just ****ed me off

    they arent partners with hanson but if they are

    and about that better name i should go over there and beat the **** out of that ass hole
    that top 10 wasnt even humorous. I hope that guy doesn't plan on going into writing for a "humor and wit" website!

  5. #5
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    That is just wrong.
    The older a person gets, the less they care what they wear. Old people come up with some of the strangest clothing combinations you'll ever see. I think of it as "cancer of the clothing."
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  6. #6
    Ya Stand Meh!!?!?!!111 JJaX's Avatar
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    Do people actually write this S4it and think its funny? Im all pi55ed off now and im gonna go kick some little kid off his big wheel.

    You know this was written by some 14 year old POS2 fanboy
    Last edited by JJaX-XBA; 08-01-2002 at 03:08 PM.

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  7. #7
    Registered User symposiumx's Avatar
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    Originally posted by JJaX
    Do people actually write this S4it and think its funny? Im all pi55ed off now and im gonna go kick some little kid off his big wheel.

    You know this was written by some 14 year old POS2 fanboy
    LOL

    I wish I had a big wheel....ok..heres the deal...

    YOU smack him...I'll take the bigwheel WOO~HOO!!

  8. #8
    Registered User Keltiks's Avatar
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    I read the whole thing I don't don't feel any different. After reading one or two rumors I began to picture the guy who wrote this and started laughing. The only thing that article could have possibly done to me is make me dumber.

  9. #9
    Wondering Around
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    next time, just share the link and spare us the torture... if you want to share a bit, just take a quote, dont quote the entire article.


    edit: back open for now
    Last edited by Shannon-XBA; 08-02-2002 at 01:06 PM.

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